Guilty

I won’t tell you you’re beatiful

Look elsewhere if

That is what you’re searching for

There is no such thing as honor

We are all ftactured

The approval we seek

Is only from others with dirty secrets

We can’t  hear our own voices anymore

I tire of these masks we wear

And I am guilty 

I would love to say that these words

Themselves

Are not me begging to regain

Everything lost

But that would be a lie in my mouth

I have heard silence so loud it hurt

Loneliness so strong it suffocated

My mistakes are endless

My trauma is extensive

I have returned from nowhere

I am not the only one

All of this

 and I will tell you what I have found

You don’t need to be beatiful

You don’t need to live your

“Best”

Life

Perfection is a shooting star that burns out

I won’t tell you you’re beatiful 
But amidst the chaos

The trauma

The lost chances

The story of your life has been written

You are the broken glass that creates a mirage

Liberation

There have been effects in my life

That I have clung to

With bleeding hands

And a begging mouth

I refused to let them slip away

People that I held too tightly

Until they could no longer

Take a breath

Items of no value

Except nostalgia

Ideas that I could not be convinced

Were untrue

Pain that embraced me

As I lay willing in it’s arms
Until a second

A strike of light

A shadow overwhelming

Overcame me
Essential and cutting

I was free

I was liberated
Everything I held on to

Faded away

My hands healed

And I let go

Redeemed

Oasis

I have such contempt

For those days that stretch out like eons

When my heart feels like a desert

Desiccated by the hateful sun

Teeming with life

That only comes out at night

Silent
Give me the the snarl

The tangle

The disquiet

Of rain

The scent on the wind

And that enthralling sensation

When the light changes

And the wind speaks
Eternity in a single drop

Then they come en masse

Let me worship

The thunder crash

The lightnight flash

The impishness

Unconcerned with destructiom
Give me peace as the storm eases

Let my eyes take in

The life it brings

Let me be a camera

Catching moments

To hold in my hands
Let my heart be an oasis

Defeating the Void

The spinning cosmos

Vast, perplexing and beyond out grasping

Fingertips

We are less than the flash of a shooting star

We are a modicum of a molecule

We are ashes and cinders

As we ignite

You and I were shining lights in the void

Passion personified

Until our deviation led to vitriol

Fervor that lead to war

Nothing I could do was ever enough

And you lived life like you would never die

Debauchery and fist fights

Never seeing that similarity

Or perhaps loathing that you saw yourself in me

But wait

The cosmos spin

You faded like the flash

of a shooting star

And I whisper that I know

You tried

I shout to the heavens

That I forgive you

In case

Just in case you might be listening

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Echoes in Time

You remind me of clean white dunes of sand

And the silence carried by the desert wind

A lonely echoing in my ears

How I yearn for the music of your laugh

How I long to hear you speak

Those sound waves that crash up my ears

Like the ocean

But I subsist on ghosts and whispers

I starve

Only to be sustained by memory

There is grief

Oh yes

But there is also rapture

Because despite reality

Sound carries from the past

And somewhere you are home

In my secret imagination

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Th