No Answer

I need a phone call
But melancholy malaise
Is my specialty
And your death only brings images and ideas
To miss you
Is to lose
My witness
Your wounds
Still damage me
But your humanity
Is like memories on fire
The way you flickered
The way I burned
I need a phone call
But I sacrifice
Because there is no answer

A Season of Loss

Ironic miracles of the most tragic kind
Have been falling around me like hateful hail
But I am not battered
I am made of tougher stuff
No nobility
Just compassion
And a desire to love those who loved me
A season of loss
I was full of realization as I watched
And step by step
Painfully
I grew
One last gift
One last time where I could provide
Now the world is swirling surreal
Everyone is at a loss for words
But by nature I am not silent
With my heart beating frantically on my sleeve
I try to dream
With my stomach in knots
I try to say goodbye
One last snapshot
One last picture
Where we are sisters
Then missing you will become
My double edged companion
If I am kind it was because of you
If I am compassionate it was because of you
If I am strong it is because of you
Thank you seems wasted
But I am grateful nonetheless
Take that with you
Knowing that you were worth it
Find forgiveness
From yourself
Sacrifice your guilt
Miracles
A menagerie

What I will Do

With a sun at my back
And the speed in my feet

I am not destiny
I am not faith

I am ego
I am id

I am a whisper
Waiting to be spoken

Because my voice is weak
My heart is still healing

I don’t know if it will ever
Recover

I don’t know how to lose you
I don’t know how to help her

Beneath the tree
And the nature you loved
I see myself
Warm in the sun

I know you’re with me
We always found each other
When we really needed to
I only wish I could hold your hand now

I only Hope this doesn’t break me
Sister of mine
How I long to hear your voice

I am drained
But for you I drink
For you I hold on

For her I love
For her I beg
She is shining
In her weakness

I am here
Alone in mind